The Greatest Herf on Planet Earth

Just got back from the world's greatest Herf.  As a southern boy, not much about Ohio gets me very excited, but this certainly never fails to have me giddy as a kid prior to Halloween.  Except THIS doesn't give me diarreah (sp).  Halloween always did.  I would just get so excited I'd make myself to sick to go out.  Cruel Irony.

So I drove 12 hours overnight to get to Northern Ohio and was treated to breakfast.  Forget that I had just eaten at Denny's to kill an hour and settle my caffienated stomach.  Both were good.  I am not going to talk a lot about who and what, just state that for two days I was able to leave the keys to my car in my motel room and drink the finest liquor, eat excellent food, share the finest craft beers available and smoke cigars that 98% of the world's smokers would kill to take a crack at.  And the people are exceptional as well.  From the host clear down to the young man who pulled a Halloween on himself and ended up face down in the dirt overnight.  Better than the lake, I guess.  No sis...it was NOT me.  I told a few people who asked, "This is a place where I bought a bottle of Crown Royal for the liquor table and checked all around to make sure no one saw that it was me that put up this 'inferior' bottle of whiskey, haha.  Lot's of people think it's fine enough.  But you should see the table.

Well, actually you CAN.........

I am not a huge liquor fan, but for sure I prefer it to beer.  But one thing that is good about living alone for 25 years, you have no one to impress, no one to show off for.  I keep a few bottles in the house, but don't have much as a rule.  I forget my problems the natural way, by forgetting them.  I keep about 5 bottles of bourbon to have with cigars, and rarely use it.  Twice a year?  Maybe.  Plus some rum for the Jimmy Machine.

But Picture a lake setting so serene and beautiful and perfect for hosting 90-100 of your closest friends who will try but rarely completely succeed to remember they are your guests.  Ashes end up in the grass, as do butts, and in general, the lawn is trampled flat.  His 4 jet-skis, two mopeds and large boat are on hand for cruising.  There are ice chests full of the other thing people bring in mass quantities, craft beers.  The host provides everything else, except cigars.  And it is a wonderful, respectful, raucous, bawdy, beautiful time.

You have to know when to take a rest before the action heats up.

You have to know when to take your camera out on a boat ride to Cedar Point Amusement Park to drop off the wife of an attendee and get some gas for the boat.

You have to wait for the dog to enter a sunset shot to make sure it's perfect...

You have to make sure your cigar is completely lit before beginning to enjoy it to ensure a good burn.

And you have to make sure that you take pictures of the important stuff.

And ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS remember to take your blog glasses to give to your target demographic.

And NEVER EVER let people watch you hit golf balls into a lake, if you suck like me, anyway.

BAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaa!

It's widely known I have the palate of a Billy Goat.  I did not coin that term, I wish I knew the smoker who did.  I'd like to meet him, because it's so perfect.  I KNOW what I like.  I like what I taste.  But there is more to be tasted and liked and I just can't do it.  As this blog has come through it's 1st year anniversary, a number of things are coming to pass for the second time since I started.  One of them is that World's Greatest Cigar Herf up in Ohio.  Cigars that are scarce as natural blond japanese guys get smoked up regularly.  And so it came to pass that I got to smoke some pretty great cigars this weekend.  And they were good smokes, from what 2-3 puffs could tell.  But on two occasions, I had to tell my uber-gracious host "it's GOOD, but I honestly don't GET IT."  I had a little run at a Havana Davidoff No.1.  It's old yellowing band that had once been stark white attested to it's long life as a cigar.  And unlike most of it's Davidoff family, this cigar still had some legs left.  Maybe it's from a box of re-banded '99 lonsdales that Mitchell Orchant slipped some old Davi bands onto.  Or maybe it is a rare Davidoff in a line of mostly spent, or getting there, smokes.  But while it was smooth and rich and delicious, it was no better to me than a Diplomaticos No.1.  Or rather, had I not seen the band, I would not have known it was a long discontinued gem.

So perhaps puzzled, or enraged even, my host approached me later with a 1492.  Thanks again, and from the bottom of my heart, for having me up to Ohio in the first place, but thanks a million for the chance to smoke my first 1492.  Sadly though, it happened again.  I THINK only about 12-15,000 were ever boxed.   I took a few gentle puffs, and then one whisper of a breath puff, and still, great flavor that stood up to any non-cuban cigar, but NOT quite what I would call special.  This completes the trifecta, with me having had a similar experience 3 years ago when he handed me a 90's era Cohiba.  It was smooth and delicious, but not discernably different from anything else of quality I had had to that point.

So why do I mention it at all?  I used to smoke a great deal of cigarettes.  And pot....I won't lie.  I hate to ever admit it, because I can see my sister imagining me in the home of a dope dealer, and her blood must just curdle.  But it's not like some kind of illicit Ralph Bakshi cartoon.  More like a Freak Brothers comic.  I always thought it rather innocent.  But I AM the Black Sheep.  AHHhhhh!  Maybe THAT'S it.  Maybe I do not have the palate of a Billy Goat, but rather a Black Sheep.  Years of going to sleep with a tongue that tasted like it had been stepped on repeatedly by a alley-dwelling homeless guy has just taken the best layers of taste buds off.  I can taste good stuff, but I can't zoom in and focus so to speak.  And I am not upset by it, I dealt my cards early in life and am playing them now.  But as I told my host then and am telling you now, I am not sure exactly how this is going to go from here on out.  Either he will be challenged and want to constantly let me try the best to see if I can come around some, or he has written me off now, having let me taste his finest cigars and not been pleased with the results.  But as another brother still told me at this herf, "You should ALWAYS tell people the truth, even if in your eyes the emperor has no clothes....no one likes a yes man."  Which a.) steals my favorite analogy and b.) is hardly true.  Most people like a yes-man, provided that they don't realize there IS one standing there.  But my man Dave is a pretty outstanding host, and I think it will turn out to be a bit of both A and B.

Thanks Dave, another fantastic weekend.

Photographic Safari in the Smokies

I just picked up a new camera, well an old, used camera, but entirely new to me.  I have been getting by with a bit if a digital dinosaur, the Canon SD200, for quite a number of years, over 8, maybe ten.  It's still a good camera, but my nephew Cam, whose photos I have displayed here a few times, has a great eye for photographic composition.  I thought it was time to give him a little more experience with knob turning.  His Sony is a fine compact that takes great pics in full auto.  But it DOES have settings, buried in menus, for shutter speed and aperture.  He just never needed to mess with them much.  His camera took fantastic photos with just a point and click.
So I was poking around at bhphotovideo.com, which I highly recommend to anyone looking to get the best legit deal on all kinds of imaging gear.  This New York company has it all, and while in my WORK, I never had any use for their used equipment selection, in my personal life I decided to give them a shot. 

I ordered him a Canon S5 IS, a camera that is at least 8 years old, and has been made obsolete by several generations of Canon Superzooms.....only it HASN'T.  People who own these newer and more expensive cameras say they simply returned the newer models and went back to their S5s, since there was no real upgrade to photo quality, or at least low light performance without noise.  IF they were smart enough to have KEPT their S5s.  Anyway, I picked one up for my nephew to present to him at the Smokies.  (I apologize...for our international brethren, that's the Great Smoky Mountains National Park, Americas's most visited, and dare I say, most popular, national Park.  They are among the oldest, if not he oldest mountains on Earth.. http://www.nps.gov/grsm/index.htm . )  I played with it to ensure it was in good order, and was so impressed with it I picked up one for myself.  I think one was 180 and one was 120.  They were in various states of battering from their rough lives.

So let's get going...I am sitting on the balcony with my mother having coffee and taking a few pics of misty mountains and there is this cicada on the railing.  Now I know they don't like to move if they don't have to, they just like to make noise and sit there.  So I get all macro on his butt, and seconds after this pic, it flies right around the camera and at my face, buzzing and rattling all the way,which kinda freaked me out, but not too bad.

Now all this week, my nephew and I are locked in this epic photographic battle, which I should win going away.  I have a career centered around a lens, and I have been messing with this camera for weeks.  And yet he still kicks my tail.  But unlike last year's Audubon Park photos, I will not be featuring his shots here.  It's the price he pays for kicking my butt.  Actually I just don't have copies.  But all week we would hook our cameras up to the flat screen at the cabin and show our daily haul of 200-300 pics each.  Mine were often dawn shots in low light and in poor focus.  These cameras are not great at low light and struggle to focus.  But he still did me in, conditions smonditions.  My favorite shots were in Cades Cove, looking for bear, but settling for FLOCKS of deer...herds, I guess, lol.

To some, these shots are rather boring...tame deer who let you drive a car to within a couple yards of them and just keep eating clover are not much of a challenge.  But to me it's just beautiful.  Amazing even.  Certainly not boring.  To me it's almost a communication, because I was certainly talking to them while I was shooting, and they were saying something too, by not bounding off into the treeline.

That one certainly seems to be saying SOMETHING to me.  Now this cottontail, It was just freezing to stay "unseen" I guess, but it could have run, too, when my car stopped and I got out.  But it wanted to appear on the internet.  We all want our 15 mins.

And when  you are in the "Salamander Capital of the World", you have to take time to shoot the immovable.

And insects are people too, plus they are easy to shoot, at least when they do not fly away while you are focusing.  Or sting you.

Naturally I have pictures of girl's butts shot out of moving cars again this year, but that would be in poor taste apparently, displaying them here.  What wilder life IS THERE?  But my sister thinks it makes me a pervert.  I told her that when your eyesight is as poor as mine, you have to snap now, find out of they are old enough to look at later.  I am not touching them, stealing their souls, chaining them in a closet.  I am just taking a simple photograph.  I am fine with her not doing it, or her son not following my example.  But I am a bachelor living in a free society.   I don't see the harm.  It's the same picture I have been taking since high school.  Her point I guess, is that that was 35+ years ago. blabla. hehe.

So here is a picture of rhododenrons and balsam fir............

Bolivar Petit Belicoso Edicion Limitada 2009

My MOST humble apologies to all for being a slovenly butthead for what...two months now?  I am guessing most have just stopped checking in.  I guess that's the advantage of having a lot of content in place, at least new people can log in and read through all of it.  My excuse is a good one, though, because after a year of entries, it's time to repeat one.  I just got back from the Smokies again, and I had a wonderful time.  I DID NOT, however, smoke many cigars.  I always take them along, but this trip was busier than usual.  I got up early on a few of my 6 days to take in a more attractive photographic safari in Cades Cove,  once alone, and once with my nephew and mother.  You can see occasional wildlife at 4 pm in the cove, but it's not too likely.  If you want to get hit over the head with it, get up at dawn and enter the loop road at 6:30 am.  More about that in a minute.
One night I was aching a bit from a long hike on the Appalachian trail for which I was grossly under-watered, and hopped in the hot tub for a smoke and a Frozen Concoction.  I chose a Bolivar Edicion Limitada, the 2009 Petit Piramide.  This cigar got clobbered on initial release, and even as time progressed, it's scores stayed pretty low for what should have been a fantastic cigar.  People said it tasted thin, cardboard-ey and bland.  As luck would have it a friend in Nashville hooked me up...thanks Bill.  I think he traded me three for something I had that he wanted.  Well this one was a bit cracked up but smokeable.  I cut it and lit it with a little difficulty on both accounts, and this cigar REALLY DELIVERED.   I have to apologize for the pic, my camera would not cooperate.

Massive amounts of spicy and interesting smoke.  There was a strong does of tea with lemon, not purely the flavor of tea and lemon which I do not care for much, but a deep tea flavor laced with a tart acidity.  Just a phenomenal combination.  The cracked wrapper was held in check by rotating the cigar when I would take it from my mouth, slathering it down each time with a lil spit.  Otherwise it wanted to stick to my lip everytime and tear worse.  But in general, the burn was good, although you had to hold it just so in your mouth to avoid an airiness.  However, I do not like when people rip on cracks and draw in reviews, as if those flaws can be thought of as general detractions from all examples of that cigar.  Mine was just an exception.  The flavor was spot on.  It did not change a great amount over the life of the smoke.  I am sad to say I only smoked half of an already short cigar.  I got distracted by something OUTSIDE the hot tub, and had to go inside where smoking is not allowed.  I am not one who can lay a cigar down and come back to it cold.  Just too sharp and bitter.  But while it was going, the cigar was a real joy to smoke with a slight creaminess and a few draws of pine, butter, cotton candy and the tea and lemon base underneath it all.  A bit leathery to start, and a bit acidic to finish, but the middle time was perfect. 

I will not rate this cigars flaws, this was something that could not be helped.  As a flavorful cigar, this one has to be right up there in the range of 89-91.